Office worker asks work from home boyfriend to contribute to chores during the workday, gets annoyed when he waits until after work: 'It's still getting done'

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Ally Perry • Writer and Editor
Jan 2, 2026 9:00 AM EST

Proponents of working from home praise its flexibility, but that only goes so far.

The degree to which a remote worker is able to execute the work-life balance that their position supposedly comes with is highly dependent on the type of job that they have and the lifestyle they maintain outside of it. Where some people might be able to tidy the house, pick the kids up from school, and squeeze in a quick workout between meetings within the space of an eight hour workday, others are working under conditions that are a lot more pressurized. It cannot be forgotten that working from home still comes with the expectation of doing your job.

As a result, it can be irritating to deal with people who do not work under the same conditions claiming that you have it easy, or that you have a limitless amount of time to do with what you wish. If you are the only WFH-er in the household, it can sometimes become the source of arguments because others do not understand that this kind of job does not automatically mean a 24/7 holiday. 

At the same time, though, it cannot be forgotten that no matter how stressful your role, being in your house while doing it does give you some perks that commuters just don't have. If you're savvy, you can plan your time accordingly.

 

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  • a man lounges on a couch while looking at documents, with a pen in his hand and a laptop on his lap
    via Getty Images (Unsplash+)

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  • In this story, a man and his girlfriend found themselves at odds with one another as they had different expectations of what he should be doing as he worked from home. Previously, the girlfriend had worked from home and done some occasional chores during work hours, but now she commuted to work.

    The man worked in a role that was nearly fully remote, and as a result, his girlfriend had requested that he occasionally do some quick household tasks during the workday. He argued that he was too busy to think about that while working, to her annoyance. When she was upset to see that he had not started the laundry until after work, he wanted a second opinion on whether his boundary was too strict.

  • Am I wrong for not doing chores during work time?

    I live with my girlfriend and I work from home pretty much full time. I'll go into the office probably once every two weeks whereas my girlfriend is only home around once a week now that she has started her new job. Her old job was work from home so she'd occasionally do laundry and other chores during downtime.
    via RestaurantChemical98
  • I've been moved into a new team and have a lot of work to do so my downtime is pretty much non existent. My girlfriend has started asking me to do laundry and maybe do some dusting during the day. I've told her I will do it if I get time but that I can't guarantee it. I said I'll happily do it after work but am not likely to be able to do it in work time.
    via RestaurantChemical98
  • a woman in a white shirt pulls a woollen blanket out of a washing machine
    via kalpa mahagamage

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • She was annoyed at this and pointed out she used to do it but I just told her that our jobs are different and her having downtime doesn't mean I have downtime. Tuesday morning she asked me to do some laundry during the day and I told her I'd do it if I got time but if not I'd do it after work.
    via RestaurantChemical98
  • I was busy all day so put the laundry in the machine when I finished work. When my girlfriend got home she saw the washing machine was on and got annoyed. She asked why I hadn't done it earlier so I told her again that I didn't have the time. I asked what the difference was as it's still getting done but she just said I should have done it earlier. AITA for not doing chores during work time?
    via RestaurantChemical98
  • a man sits at a desk and holds up a document while cradling a cell phone to his ear, next to a switched on desk lamp
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    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • grundleplum YTA. You could easily load the washer before starting work, then turn it over when you eat lunch. It takes a few minutes of your time.
    via grundleplum
  • OP RestaurantChemical98 And I easily did it after work when I had time. No I won't be using my lunch break to do more work.
    via RestaurantChemical98
  • grundleplum It takes such a small amount of time that it's more efficient to do it during the day. You wanted to know if you're the asshole and you don't like the answers everyone is giving you. Why bother posting if you don't want actual answers?
    via grundleplum
  • airazaneo So you take a lunch break but can't do a 1 minute task that would make your collective lives easier during that break? I was going to give you slack if you work through your breaks but that is just... Wow.
    via airazaneo
  • OP RestaurantChemical98 Yes I can eat lunch and it's not a 1 min task.
    via RestaurantChemical98
  • slightlyhandiquacked I would genuinely like to know, why does it take you more than 60 seconds to put laundry in the washer? It takes me literally a max of 60 seconds to grab the laundry basket, walk down the stairs, put it in the washer, and start it. I'd like to know why that doesn't work for you.
    via slightlyhandiquacked
  • OP RestaurantChemical98 Putting it in the washer isn't all that's needed.
    via RestaurantChemical98
  • Sudden-County-4293 Pre work and lunch isn't paid, plenty time to do it.
    via Sudden-County-4293
  • OP RestaurantChemical98 Plenty of time to do it after work.
    via RestaurantChemical98
  • Adventurous-Bar520 I am busy wfh, but I have time to get a drink, or a snack. So I put laundry in when doing that. I take it out at the end of my lunch break. It's all about timing. Your gf is right, you can dust areas in minute gaps, it does not all have to be done at once, you can dust areas in room over a morning. You are ridiculous.
    via Adventurous-Bar520
  • OP RestaurantChemical98 So your argument is my lunch break shouldn't be a break, I should be doing more work? It's weird to me your argument is I should be stopping work to do chores tbh, What's ridiculous about doing chores when I'm actually able?
    via RestaurantChemical98
  • seagreensequin Putting laundry in takes less than 5 minutes, same time it would take you to go to the bathroom or grab a quick lunch from your kitchen, both of which you probably do. Unless you have back to back meetings all day every day, you can put the darn load in. A gentle YTA.
    via seagreensequin
  • OP RestaurantChemical98 And putting it in the machine isn't all that's needed. So because I eat lunch, I should do chores? So you not hear yourself? The chore got done, what's so essential it has to be done during working hours?
    via RestaurantChemical98
  • OldBoyShenanigans Your girlfriend asked you to do her a favour and you didn't. Did you end up hanging the washing or did she?
    via OldBoyShenanigans
  • OP RestaurantChemical98 Except the laundry got done. I hung it up. So if I ask her to do grocery shopping during work time should she stop working to do it since I asked her a favour?
    via RestaurantChemical98
  • barker2017 Based on how defensive you sound in your responses, you sound like an asshole. It takes two minutes to chuck a wash on. If it needs to go on the airer, maybe there's clothes in there that she needs that she worried won't be dry in time. It sounds like this is a request that means something to your girlfriend. Make time.
    via barker2017
  • OP RestaurantChemical98 Ah yeah. I'll just tell my manager I need to stop working to do chores/s I did it when I have time. If you need clothes the next day then it on you for leaving things so late tbh
    via RestaurantChemical98

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laundry employee working from home job work relationships girlfriend chores argument
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